Category Archives: U.S. Politics

Obama Administration to Announce European Missile Defense Plan

“WASHINGTON – The Obama administration appears likely to adopt a compromise European missile defense plan that shelves many of the components that have been a major irritant in relations with Russia, with an announcement expected Thursday.”

Predicted conservative backlash commentary:

“COMMUNISTS!”

“Obama is endangering the ‘Murcan people by talking to Russia.”

“America’s gettin’ to be more like communism every day, ya heard?”

“Why are we trying to negotiate with Europe anyway? They’re all terr’ists.”

“COMMUNISTS!”

“Nuke’em.”

“COMMUNISTS!”

“WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE!”

“Them communists are gonna come over here with them bombs; it don’t matter if they get the lazy Euros, but trying to be friendly with RUSSIA? Just proves that the health plan is socialist.”

“WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF COMMUNISTS!”

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Reasons I Wish I Still Lived in D.C.: The 9/12 Rally

On Saturday, tens of thousands of conservative voters marched on Washington, D.C., to protest the Obama administration’s reckless spending (or merely suggested reckless spending) on such traditionally un-American issues as: universal health care; taxing the rich to give to the poor; taking bonuses from Corporate America’s CEO’s; communicating civilly with governments of Muslim-majority countries; and the presence of black people in the White House.

The protests were headed by several conservative groups, including FreedomWorks and the Tea Party Patriots, the latter of whom were responsible for Teabagging America ’09:

Here are some gems from among the quotes. I don’t generally read the Daily News, but some of these were too awesome to pass up:

“You want socialism? Go to Russia!” — Susan Clark, D.C., The Washington Post

This might have been effective if she said “communism,” and if this march happened before 1991.

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“We want our country to go back to the roots of doing what our Founding Fathers wanted us to do — less government in every aspect of my life. We walked the streets of Williamsburg, and it felt like we were learning how to be a patriot.” — Debbie Wilson, Apollo Beach, Fla., The Washington Post

Patriotism = using outhouses, wearing bonnets and churning your own butter.

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“I’m outraged prominent black politicians use the race card [to cover up their failed policies].” — Deneen Borelli, New York, N.Y. Times

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With regard to Obama and healthcare: “It’s not that he’s evil, but the outcome will be.” — Suzanne Mullen, Fayetteville, N.C., N.Y. Daily News

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“Health care is not listed anywhere in the Constitution.” — Brian Burnell, 45, M.D., The Washington Post

But multi-million dollar Wall Street bonuses totally are.

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“What he’s doing to the budget, and taking over health care, is only a part of it. He’s bankrupting us. He’s not protecting us. He’s apologizing to Europe and the terrorists.” — Richie Mitzner, Fort Lee, N.J., N.Y. Daily News

Yes, trying to negotiate peacefully with Iran — as opposed to nuking them before they nuke us — is a TERRIBLE plan.

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“We’ve got a deficit so large, my grandkids won’t be able to pay it off.” — Pete Jones, New Hartford, C.T., N.Y. Daily News.

OK, so are you saying that Wall Street wouldn’t have exploded last year (WHILE Bush was still in office) if Obama hadn’t won the election? Would it be alright for your grandkids to be in debt if all the proposed health care money were going toward the defense bill?

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And don’t forget all the fabulous visual documentation of the event:

Move over, White House czars! The Boob Czarina is totally more informed and better at leading the country than you are.

Move over, White House czars! The Boob Czarina is totally more informed and better at leading the country than you are.

A future death panel victim makes his way toward the Freedom Mobile.

A future death panel victim makes his way toward the Freedom Mobile.

The next "Vogue" cover model

The next "Vogue" cover model

Uh. What?

Uh. What?

This young racist has something to say.

This young racist has something to say.

You mean about how Obama wants to institute universal healthcare as a means of effecting reparations for slavery? Totally.

You mean about how Obama wants to institute universal health care as a means of effecting reparations for slavery? Totally.

There are no words...

There are no words...

Augustus Gloop and friends

Augustus Gloop and friends

Only a conservative can be this egregiously racist.

Only a conservative can be this egregiously racist.

And be sure to check out The 10 Best Signs from the “March on Washington”, which includes “Most Racist,” “Cutest,” and “Most Ironic Acronym.” Priceless.

EDIT: I just realized I’ve forgotten to thank the photographers who so kindly posted distributable photos on Creative Commons. Thanks to: KCIvey and Andrew Aliferis

EDIT: I just realized I’ve forgotten to thank the photographers who so kindly bore witness to the event and posted re-postable pictures on Flickr. Thanks to: KCIvey; Andrew Aliferis

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Filed under Politics, U.S. Politics, Weird America